Dear Lady Monster, I masturbate a few times a day and am still ready to have sex a few more times. Sometimes I either don't have time or forget, but when I'm inspired, watch out! Does this make me a sex addict? Love, Once More Into The Breeches Dear Once More, In my opinion, sex addiction should be seen as other addictions are. It's not about the amount of sex you're having (masturbation, intercourse, oral, etc), it's your emotions around the behavior. Here are few questions to ask yourself: 1. “Is this a habit or an addiction?” Do you know the difference? Simply stated, a habit is a choice, an addiction is a compulsion. If it's a habit, you can make the choice to stop. If it's an addiction, it is beyond voluntary control. You will need outside help to make the transition from these behaviors. 2. “Am I ready to admit that I have a problem?” Are you in denial or are ready to admit that you need help? There are a list of symptoms and signs of addiction. Most common are to consider, how does your behavior affect your life? Do you feel compelled? Do you relinquish your duties, responsibilities, social engagements, relationships in order to feed your cravings? 3. “Does the place that is available to help me, really understand addiction behavior or are they just making me feel guilt and shame for having a high libido?” Many sources for help with sexual addiction treat it with puritanical ideas. They shame and guilt those seeking help and recovery for habits or issues that are problematic to others with similar ideas of what sex should be. There are risk factors, causes to be considered along with the final diagnosis, just like an addiction to alcohol, drugs or other behaviors. Does your therapist or treatment center address those, or just make you feel bad for wanting to have your regular visits with a webchat actress? Some people can be addicted to any kind of behavior that provides an escape, but the number of people that are actually addicted to sex is nowhere near the number that are told they are. It's usually people with high libidos that are being told they have a problem, rather than why they are resorting to unhealthy sexual behavior. Then again, "unhealthy" can be subjective. Is your behavior really affecting your health (mental and physical), your spouse, partner or family's health? Or, is your behavior affecting personal ideas and social norms? * * * * * * * * * * Only you can answer these questions and concerns honestly. For anyone who feels they do have an issue with sex addiction, I recommend finding a good therapist to discuss your behaviors and how to get help. If you feel that someone close to you has an addiction, I do not recommend interventions or making accusations. Provide empathy and a strong support while they make their way through healing and recovery. If you have a question or a topic you would like to have covered in this column, please go to: http://ladymonstersex.info and click on the link for the Google form. Or, call (614) 636-0936 and leave a message in my Google Voice Mail Box. Both options are 100% anonymous. Thank you.

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