Yo, wake up texters, listen in,
Uncle Sam's after more boogeymen;
Dubya left Barack in a terrible jam
Way over in Afghanistan.
So put down your iPhone and pick up a gun,
We're gonna have a whole lotta fun.
And it's one, two, three,
What are we fighting for?
Not freedom or our fellow man,
Next stop's Afghanistan;
And it's five, six, seven,
Open up the pearly gates,
Well there ain't no need to wonder why,
For peak oil, we're all gonna die.
Well come on, McChrystal, let's move fast;
Your big chance has come at last.
Gotta kill all those towel heads —
Though Muslims ain't who we should dread.
Our robber barons, they're the ones
Who blew the Towers to kingdom come.
And it's one, two, three,
What are we fighting for?
Not freedom or our fellow man,
Next stop's Afghanistan;
And it's five, six, seven,
Open up the pearly gates,
Well there ain't no need to wonder why,
For peak oil, we're all gonna die.
Huh!
Well, come on Wall Street, don't move slow,