AUSTIN, Texas -- Don't worry about a thing! The Texas
Legislature is riding to the rescue. Oh, sure, we still have a $10 billion
deficit, but the House just outlawed gay marriage. At last, we're safe from
the hideous threat of gay marriage, which would have directly ruined our
entire lives.
Meanwhile, the House has:
-- Eliminated 10,810 state jobs;
-- Cut 250,000 poor children off the Children's Health Insurance
Program and about 365,000 from health insurance through Medicaid;
-- Cut prenatal care and delivery for 17,000 pregnant women and
services for 366 women with breast and cervical cancer;
-- Closed one state school for the mentally retarded and one
state mental hospital;
-- (This one's my favorite) Cut $22 million from a criminal
justice program that provides medication and treatment for mentally impaired
offenders who are out on probation or parole. (Isn't that nice? They'll be
wandering around the state without their meds.)
But fear not, as our peerless leaders have passed a 24-hour